Flashing back the Sparkle

As a parent you often have many flashback to some amazing moments, and then some moments that you want to forget. For myself I often get a glimpse back into the most amazing moments with Sydney, and then the dreaded flashback to the night she was taken from us. 

No matter how many times I tell the story to someone the pain just comes through my heart. Yesterday I had a chance to tell the story about Sydney to someone that didn't know it. The lady was so proud of the way I told her story and said, "thank you for sharing". As soon as I was done sharing, I got that pit in my stomach. A flashback to the night the doctors at the hospital said, "I'm sorry Mr. And Mrs. Craven there is nothing else we can do", or even "she's not breathing Heather" as I ran into their bedroom. As a parent nothing prepares you for something like that. I have multiple flashbacks from that night, and even the one of Logan who just cried, because he didn't know what was going on. He was comforted, and thankfully will only have the beautiful memories that we remember with of Sydney. 

I retell the story so many times, because it helps. It makes me sad, but then happy that we're coming along so strong. It's not easy, and I'll say it until I'm old and gray, but "I want everyone to remember Sydney." Flashbacks or not she had an amazing little life, and will always shine and sparkle on!!!