Memories can be painful

Lots of snow, snuggles, and a little cabin fever came yesterday. When I actually take a day to do nothing, my mind goes in all these different ways. Sometimes it's hard to explain, but it just comes. There's no explanation except the constant unknown, and frequent heartache. It didn't help that we lost power for a few and all Logan wanted to do was watch videos of him and Ne-Ne. Now most parents would just take the video away from their child, but when I tried Logan refused. How painful as I took a deep breath and watched him scroll one by one. As the tears ran down my face, Logan looked at me and said, "mama take my fafa" as I held the "fafa" ( what he calls his stuffy) I just took a deep breath, and wiped away the tears. I think I need a good cry, but it's not easy, and is super painful. I just miss her!!!