Today I was just about to finish my blog on the twin bond when Lo-Lo called my name and I hit the delete button. At first I wanted to scream because it was all gone, but then just laughed because if you have twins or know someone that has twins situations like this happen all the time. You got one kid pulling you one way and the other another way.
The twin bond could be talked about forever as the memories are created overtime. It's been 3 weeks since Sydney has passed away. I replay the tradgic night over and over again with every detail possible. I remember coming into my now house of 3 and thinking how am I going to tell Logan, and how will he be without his Ne-Ne?
Even though Logan and Sydney were boy/girl twins they were similar in so many ways, which include their long lashes, personalities that can light up the room, and constant love for each other .
Both kids are a combination of both Shane and my personalities. Logan is more Shane though with his easygoing personality, cuddly side, and comical side. Sydney was my mini-me. People would say wow Heather she is so you. Maybe it was her spunkiness, the little diva in her, her love for dancing and being in the spot light at all times that brings out me...to name a few :)
Since Sydney has passed away I believe that she has left a little piece inside of Logan. He now has a little more spunk to his step, can talk in 3-4 word sentences, and continues to light up the room with his smile and personality. At times its hard to look at Logan because I see Sydney right there.
Every morning Logan asks for the IPad and wants to look at pictures of Syd before he watches Frozen for the 1000time. Today I started to cry when Logan put on the flipagram video. I was sad because I just miss her so much, and hope that Logan remembers his twin for a lifetime. I am so thankful for the memories that I was able to capture on my phone (over 2000 pics and 100 videos) that captured the twin bond.
If anyone ever tells you to stop taking pictures or you don't need to capture that silly moment that just happened(maybe pudding all over the place) just snap the camera. Creating that memory is so important.
I will continue to remind Logan each day how remarkable his twin Sydney was. As I've said since the beginning: the twin bond will live on forever. Ne-Ne will alwasy be a part of Logan and will live on forever.
When you say "I miss her so much" it's like a knife to my heart. I am so sorry for your loss. I love reading your blog because it reminds me to be thankful for all the little things. Your strength astounds me xoxo
ReplyDelete*tears* What a special moments that Logan starts his morning with pictures of Sydney <3 No words can ever take the pain away, or help us understand what ever moment without sweet Sydney is like for you all. Praying for strength for you all.... So special that you have all those memories to keep close and show Logan as he grows.
ReplyDeleteStephanie Studley