Happy birthday LoLo and Syd

March 28, 2013- the day Shane and I were doubly blessed with two beautiful babies.  A boy and a girl would complete our family. We watched them reach their milestones, blow out their candles on their first birthday, and build on the twin bond all the way until 9 days prior to their second birthday. March 19, 2016 our life was shook up, and changed forever. Logan was without his with twin physically, and would have to go on our to celebrate his second birthday without his twin by his side. 

A year has passed and we remembered, and sparkled so well. We've laughed, cried, got angry, and found ourselves overwhelmed with emotions. Yesterday we celebrated year 3. Sydney wasn't here, but I bet you she was watching over her brothers excitement as we celebrated his birthday. Logan requested a HelloKitty balloon and a MinnieMouse balloon to accompany her area and the garden. We celebrated with breakfast this morning were we said goodbye to Nana and Papa. Then we made our way to LegoLand, spent the afternoon doing a few errands, a quick 3 year checkup, off to Sydney's area, and then came home to blow-out both cakes. One for Sydney and one for Logan. We had an amazing weekend and a great day yesterday. Logan is happy, healthy, and full of energy. He's a growing 3 year old with so much love to give. As Logan blew out the candles we wish more than anything that his year is filled with love, laughter, and great memories. We hope Sydney is twirling around in her tutu, singing a song, and smiling up in the sky. Here's to another year where we watch Logan grow up into a handsome young boy, and we continue to remember the sparkle above!!!

A hopping Easter 2016

Easter 2016 was filled with lots of love, laugh, family, friends, and of course a little bit of sparkle. This is actually my second Easter without Sydney, but pretty much feels like the first. Logan was such a good boy today. He was filled with lots of smiles, giggles, and just enjoyed all the Easter activities. Unfortunately, my heart hurt a little extra today, because all I could think of was my baby girl. As I looked at all the other little girls today in their Easter dresses I couldn't help but have a heavy heart. I always wonder what Sydney would be like if she was here, and how special the bond would be to see. This has been a fun-filled exhausting weekend, and we have one more day to finish the celebrating as Logan and Sydney's birthday is today. Easter 2016 is in the books and it was a good day. Here's to another year when the Easter bunny comes to visit again, more memories are made, and we continue to remember the sparkle!!!

Logan's 3rd Birthday Paw-ty

What an amazing day yesterday spent with friends and family for Logan's 3rd birthday. The expression on Logan's face was priceless all around. We are so blessed to have so much love given to Logan on such a special day. We know that Sydney was with us, and was spoken about a lot yesterday. Last year we should have had the twins' birthday party at My Gym,  but we changed the party because of the tradgedy that hit us hard. 

As Logan blew out the candles we all made a wish. A wish that Logan would be happy and healthy, and that all his dreams will come true. Logan, mommy and daddy hope the rest of your birthday weekend is amazing. We would like to thank everyone who came out to celebrate, and who made the day extra special and sparkly for LoLo. 

 

The day we finally said goodbye

March 26, 2015- the day we finally laid our baby girl to rest. I actually had to go back and look at what the date was, because it all seems like a blur in relation to the 19th of March. I remember a lot from a year ago, and can imagine how blown-up my timehop will be with pictures and memories. There was just a sea of pink that day, and a rainbow that filled the sky as we came up to the church. It was supposed to rain that day, but we had pink umbrellas on hand. We didn't need them because Sydney was with us, and the sun was shining until we were done. 

As I look back on a few pictures in my phone I actually can't believe how little Logan was compared to now. 2 years old to now 3 years old. Look how far we've all come. Tomorrow we will spend our day celebrating Logan all day at his birthday party filled with lots of friends and family. No matter how much fun we will be having there will be something that might bring me back to a year ago. A year ago we said goodbye to the pink casket, let the pink and white balloons go, and wished upon a star that Sydney will always be with us. Fast forward she's still with us everyday, and will be with us as Logan blows out the candles tomorrow and makes his own wish!!!

Nana and Papa come to visit

Yesterday my parents came in from Florida( West Boca to be exact for all my family friends). It's been a year since I have seen my dad and 18 months since I saw my mom. The last time my mom saw me, Sydney and Logan were 18 months old and we had visited everyone in Florida. Unfortunately, my mom wasn't able to make it up for Sydney's funeral because she was recovering from knee surgery. It was very hard to not have my mom here with me, but ultimately I had to grieve on my own. I asked my parents to go to see Sydney's area and bench prior to seeing me yesterday. I wanted my parents to have their alone time with Sydney without me, because it's just too hard to watch my mom grieve. It makes me feel like I'm regrieving all over again. At dinner last night my mom would talk about Sydney and say, " why did this happen?" It's very painful to deal with this. My parents will be here through the weekend, and will be able to celebrate Logan's birthday. They are very excited to spend time with Logan and see us. It wasn't easy yesterday, but we got through it. Here's to a weekend with my parents, friends, and family. 

Keep Calm and Sparkle On

Yesterday morning my co-workers decided to throw me a "sparkle breakfast" in honor of Sydney. There was a lot of pink, sparkles, good food and good company. It was nice to come together with everyone in rememberance of Sydney. Even though I might not talk about her every single day I am still constantly referencing her, or thinking about her. I ask myself everyday, "how do I do it?" To be honest I surprise myself, but there's something about the sparkle that keeps me alive, well, and powering forward. It's not easy, but I believe if people are thinking about Sydney for even a second during the day, that some how it comes back to me. Pretty remarkable I think? Her power is huge, the sparkle is truly strong, and the impact is widely spread to young and old. As always I'll lift my head high, shine bright, and will sparkle on!!!

Dreaming big for Sydney's Foundation

The last few days have been so busy that I forgot to announce some exciting news from The Sydney Craven Memorial Fund. After 364 days we have become an official non-profit. This is something that takes a lot of effort, dedication, hard work, and an amazing support team. I couldn't imagine doing this alone, and I'm so thankful for my amazing board members who have helped me make Sydney's foundation a success. We are a new non-profit, and we still have a lot to learn. We are so excited for our first tutu run/sparklefest on June 18th, and can't wait to give out our first round of scholarships to children in the community. These scholarships will help children enhance their self-esteem through extracurricular activities. 

As Sydney's mom my dedication continues to grow. I want to keep her legacy going forever, and keep that sparkle alive. This mama has been though so much, but is dedicated to sparkle on, and establish a fund that will help others in the community. I'm not going to give up Sydney, and will continue to make you proud!